Wicked Jan 6th 2007 - The Extra Mile

"The Extra Mile"

One of our teachers related a story to me recently about a student of hers who is using all the tools of Kabbalah but is still experiencing major chaos.

This student is facing the reality that her company is downsizing in the coming months and she might lose her job. Her question to the teacher was, basically, "What gives?"

It's a really good question, and one I know all Kabbalah students face at some point in their journey. Especially in the month of Capricorn. It's a time when we start to doubt that what we are doing is working. Basically, it's a time when the you-know-what really starts to stink.

And my answer is: breathe it in.

The tests are coming now because the Light wants us to work harder at finding it. The more we sweat and squirm, the greater the revelation will be.

Keep using the tools and getting comfortable in the uncomfortable zone. You never know how close you are to penetrating the darkness and tapping into the Light. And as experience shows us, the day we give up is usually the day the answers are ready to reveal themselves.

I know this isn't easy when you're receiving bad news from the doctor or overwhelmed with other difficult issues in your life. But this is all part of the game we signed up for in the endless world.

The strategy to this game is to accept the junk, really accept it and even be grateful for it. The faster you do, the quicker you'll reach the Lighter side.

This week, take stock of where your life is at right now. Know that the difficulties are there for a beneficial reason. Remember that the only mile that counts is the extra mile. Oh, and about that student who's stuck between a rock and a hard place: I told her that in her darkest moment, if she can find a way to give, and to give big, she can expect her life to change in unimaginable ways.

I look forward to hearing about her miracles, and yours as well.

All the best,
Yehuda

Funny, how I get this message from my friend in a time in which I feel defeated and lost in my own home town.

I came back from Europe defeated. This dear friend in Boston picked me up in airport and stayed with me all nigght keeping me company in my hotel room. That was an act of pure love which is a major characteristic of him.

Then feeling hungry and with the desire to see the city that feels like a second home to me, I went out of my room the next day. It was just a short visit to the financial center of Boston. But I stopped in a place to buy something for this other person that I have not words to describe our relationship. I can only say that each time we are together I feel like none has made me feel before. Even one touch and I can feel this sesantion all over my buddy. It is amazing how just with one touch I can feel such sensation all over my buddy. But I bought this present without any expectation of getting together on this visit to Boston.

To my surprise, the door bell of my hotel room rang at 3:00 AM. When I open the door I heard the comment "I thought you would be awake, sorry for being so late" for which I paid not too much attention and started kissing this person with the passion that always overcome me when we are together. Just like the last time I was in town, we slept together after what I call an experience that keeps getting better and better each time we see each other.

It was hard to leave Boston this time. I think part is because I do not know when would be the next time I would come back again. I did not say this to this person but I felt uncofortable not sayinh anything about it. Now, I am back home and I am feeling just like this note from my friend. I have to admit that a major part of me feeling this way is what I think I am feeling for this person but I am not sure of my feelings any more. I am not sure about a lot of things any more. Europe was an eye opening experience that reminded me of a lesson I have not yet finished learning in my life. Funny how that call from my little borther while I was in Boston refirm me the roots of this problem in me. I hope my experience would help him realize that the same thing is happening to him. That some how we both need to put a end to this believe in which we were brought up that love is given always to us under condiction in which we always have to sacrify ourselves. That should end up with us and not let it continue any more.

It was hard to leave Boston. I still do not know how to define my relationship with this person who is the main reason for me to visit the city so often. I do not if I want to. I just know that when we are together I feel like none has ever made me feel before.

So this is to you buddy, I want the light to come to me and eliminate all the darkness where I feel I have lost myself since my return from Europe. I want home to feel like my home. I like to be with this person once again in the near future. I would try to endure this feeling of lost and go the extra mile if you deliver the light once again.