Buddy, Thanks for your words of encouragement. Last night while in the phone with my dear friend, he reminds me how important is not to dewl on what is happening or in the circustance in which I find myself.
Yes I am guilty for letting it get me to this level of fustration. Yes since I have gone independent almost everyone has taken advantage of me. That does not mean I will change my way and therefore, not to give my trust any more. But some how I found myself with not tolerance to how fleaky everyone has been. It is like when I lost my dear friend Mark all the chance for me to find people that real were gone with him. I have endure worst but each time someone is not being true or try to take advantage of me, reminds me of what I lost.
All I wanted was to do what I do best. They are always trying to force me to be a permanent employee. It is only in certain projects and certain role that a bring real value. I can not be used a technical hired hand to keep building on a design or idea that neither brings vakue nor is done following the highes standard whcih are the only means to be successful.
Friday, has been the worst of all days but some how you do show me how you balance yourself out. I grateful for the people you have put in my path. The love and caring that they have shown me is unvaluable. You always manage to do that and some how I am able to see that so at the end I look at the positive.
I thank you for all. I know that you will bring to me the permanent position where I bring more value. I am shooting for big blue. They have the chance to develop with me the finest Siebel Analytics practice if all they are saying in that ad is true.
I find difficult to keep going if my work is not bring value. Money does not get me out of bed any more. Doing what I love and sharing my knowledge so that at the end client can enjoy the benefits of an application that they can enhance on their own is what makes me hapy. My Mark is gone and my friend is right. Please let him have peace that I will try not to missing as I go through lies and false promises. Because at the end we will prevail like we have always being able to manage.
Grateful more than ever for all your gifts and expect you to let only good things in which I can do my best work to come my way.
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